There is something that has been stuck in my head all week. I’ll just get right into it.
I was munching in some cheddar biscuits at Red Lobsters -yes, I dine at franchise restaurants- and a girl of mine, Ally* wanted to talk about boys. She started to say that she sensed she was in a “toxic relationship.” Toxic is a spicy word, especially if it’s said after dinner and you’ve just had a shot of patron. Continue reading
I’m sorry, but I only looked at Teyana throughout this entire screening. Maybe you will too….
She got me tuned in to her music. Now, what about you?
Okay, so my a$$ randomly came across a new website called Elitedaily thanks to Guyism. Don’t come for me saying I’m “late” or anything like that, I’m good.
Anyway, I found an article that lists 10 things women need to come to grips with for 2013. There were two things on this list that had me widen my eyeballs.
1. Have more orgasms
Women are always given mixed message on how to be a lady. On the one hand, everyone makes fun of “promiscuous” girls like Superhead, Kat Stacks, or Melissa Ford.
And on the other hand, everyone looks at you like you’ve lost your mind when you’re not having sex by choice. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times guys have said to me, “You need d#$%” or that I need a “one night stand.”
I’m not even going to put it on dudes alone, because women do that too. There was a time I went to my lady doctor, aka OBGYN, and her eyes nearly fell out of her sockets when she heard me say that I’m not having any relations. She then said that I should be having ‘fun’ and that she was having a blast with her cootie cat when she was my age. I was stunned. Here I am getting my pap smear and she’s telling me to embrace the concept of promiscuity. If anything, I thought she would say “That’s good you’re not having relations because you have a lesser chance of contracting STD’s or having an unwanted pregnancy.” Nope, her reaction was the complete opposite.
Why does everyone want women having sex 24/7? Can a shorty be celibate or abstain in peace tho?
Sure, there are benefits to having an orgasm but that sexin’ lifestyle doesn’t need to be shoved down the throats of women. We’ll have sex when we want to, bruh.
2. You don’t have to be in a relationship to be happy.
This is bull because no one wants to let a woman live if she doesn’t have a man!
I’ve had many a girlfriend who were perfectly fine being single until they were with family members or friends. Women always have to deal with the ‘why aren’t you seeing someone’ drill at public gatherings. This is especially the case after college, even if your mother or aunt raised her kids alone. I think the real headline should be, “Dear F#$%rs Leave Single Women Alone, They’re Happy.”
Men too, they give women the third degree too when they come across a pretty face who is man free. The convo goes a little something like this; Random man: “Ayo shorty, you look good. I know you’ve got to have a man taking that down every night.” Answer: “No, I’m single.” Random man: “Dang, why not though? You should be out dating with your boyfriend. Why are you single?”
These conversations are annoying as hell when you’re perfectly fine with the choice to be testicle free. You’re now left staring at a guy you may or may not know very well waiting for an answer.
I think society should find a way to accept women who are single. Don’t judge a lady for her choice to be single. Also, for the love of bunnies, don’t ask her why she doesn’t have a man either. Don’t.
But, there was one thing that I f$^&ed with from this article. The fifth item on the list had this bit of advice: “Women have a tendency to date men similar to the one who hurt them the most. Don’t fall into this trap. Stand up for yourself and know that your standards must change.” ß This is a hard topic to grip but it’s true. I used to deal with serious assholes and the minute I realized I needed to stop things got better. Now, I’m dealing with a whole new batch of unsolicited obnoxious idiots. Life is great.
Thanks for rocking with me and share this article with your friends whether they are team estrogen or team testosterone.
Tweet a bish: @NessaLovesMUSIC
Okay, I must preface this blog post with a disclaimer.
I’ve wanted to do personal blogs for the longest motherfuggin time, but I’ve always had someone in my ear talking this ‘branding’ stuff and then I’d over-think the whole thing. I wound up making multiple WordPress, Blogger, Livejournal, YouTube accounts for different topics. These social media accounts are all in the cyberworld collecting dust. Needless to say, I don’t remember the passwords of half of these accounts because it’s too much to have 5 diff accounts for 5 different topics. This is definitely the case when you’re starting off. So, enough! I’ma just do me and I welcome you into the thoughts that make up this dimpled chick named Vanessa Denis. If I wind up coming off as a scatterbrain on here, don’t shade me because I’m just multifaceted. 
END OF DISCLAIMER.
So, dating in NYC is a joke. A lame joke. Yes, you can go on many dates, but half of the time, these dates superficial and similar to one night stands. You may never see the ninja who took you out to Dos Cominos ever again. Or you’ll meet a ninja who like to hang out with you and one day you’ll just stop hearing from him. It’s weird in NYC.
Now, personally I’m just chilling -no dates. These ninjas aren’t… doing it for me right now. I mean, I like go out every now and then but that’s it. I’m not looking past that one time because I’m not about to over-invest in nann ninja. (haha, I keep writing ‘ninja.’)
Anyway, I bring this topic up because there was a guy (Exhibit A) who asked me out on a date. He seemed okay, talkative, and chill. We picked a day for the date last week but I needed to change the time. I text the dude and he never got back to me. Mind you, he’s the one who asked ME out. *exhales*
Then there was a guy (Exhibit B) from my job, I generally feel funny/skeptical messing with folk I work with, but he asked me about getting drinks or hanging out a few weeks ago. I emailed him, and he wrote me back, but when it came down to finalizing things, he never got back to me. Weird. Once again, another flake from a dude I wasn’t even trying to snatch up.
Lastly, there was this guy I went out with during the Tribeca Film Festival. Exhibit C loved the film we screened and had to rush out after the Q&A because he had a dentist appointment in the morning. I have not heard from this guy since then, it’s been weeks. Exhibit C and I met at a spa and he was blowing up my phone for the longest for us to hang out. So, it’s funny that he went m.i.a after seeing a film. Well, I don’t think I really care anyway because all he talked about was acting, working in finance, and I can’t remember the third thing because I’d tune him out by then.
Now, to deal with all of this is weird because I’m not even out to find a man. I don’t want to have ‘boom-boom room’ activities, one night stands, double dates, etc. Yet, I’m still dealing with the nonsense.
Whatever, I don’t even want any of this. I’ll take a friend… but finding “real” people in NYC is another topic. Ha. I probably sound mighty cynical here.
I just want these ninjas to stop wasting my time. Or at least give me a dollar if you will waste my time. Be fair.
-@nessalovesmusic.
I interviewed the-dream for power 105.1 [power1051fm.com] and when i brought up Casha, she was off limits. these two are no longer working together and that’s too bad. there are legal issues going on and it seems like she’s not going to be on radio killa records anymore. that part of the interviewed had to be removed, but it’s a juicy tip. the rest of our interview will be up on Power soon. tweet me, vanessa denis, @nessalovesmusic.
[#teamlowercaseletters]
Laura’s signed to Sony Music Entertainment UK Limited and “That’s Alright” is from her album, Sing To The Moon.
She’s beautiful:
Who made you the center of the twitterverse? Well, just tweet me @NessaLovesMusic.
